Time and money

The days continue to fly by... look at how big this girl is getting! I've got about 5 weeks left of maternity leave left before I head back to work.

So with that in mind, last week I went and signed Juliana up for daycare. It's right next to my work so I can drop in for lunch every day if I like (and I do, very much). It's a Montessori which is also nice. I was a Montessori kid myself (for pre-K and K) so I'm comfortable with their methods, etc. Two of my colleagues also have their kids enrolled in the same facility and they've been very happy with the care their kids receive which is also good to know.

And while I'm not looking forward to going back to work, it's something that needs to be done. We live in a costly part of the country (according to recent reports, we're the 9th most expensive market in the nation) and while A brings home a good amount of bacon, he will be leaving his job at the beginning of next year to take over his family's business. This scares me to no end because when he worked there just out of college years ago, the income wasn't very stable. That was 10+ years ago though and supposedly the company is now so busy, they're turning down work, which hopefully will make for a steady income on par with--or more than--what he currently is making.

As it stands now, A's salary covers all of our living expenses. We've also never been ones to deprive ourselves of nice vacations, dining out regularly, etc. (what can I say? Years of childfree living made us self-indulgent) but without my income going forward, that won't be very possible. So my income is the one that will help see us into retirement, pay for Juliana's college (and whatever else she may have her heart set on--ballet, gymnastics, whatever), allow us to take annual family vacations and weekend mini-vacations, and more. The icing on the income cake if you will.

But yes, I'm conflicted about returning to work. Before I got pregnant I had said I wanted to stay home with our child until he/she started school. When I got pregnant with Juliana, I said I wanted to stay home until she was at least 1. Now that she's here, I wonder how I can leave her at all. But at this point in our lives, leave her I must...at least she'll be right next door though so I can see her every day for my lunch hour. It's not much but I'll take it. Who knows? Maybe that will change once A takes the reins of the family business and I can then stay home with her. For now though, all I can do is hope for the future.

Even on the other side of infertility, hope resides.