/ The RE's Muse: Time and money

The RE's Muse

After 4 years of infertility, 2 surgeries, 1 miscarriage, and 19 months of high risk pregnancies, hubby and I now have two little women in our lives--one a toddler, the other not far behind. Buckle your seatbelts, it's gonna be a wild ride.

Monday, August 08, 2005

Time and money

The days continue to fly by... look at how big this girl is getting! I've got about 5 weeks left of maternity leave left before I head back to work.

So with that in mind, last week I went and signed Juliana up for daycare. It's right next to my work so I can drop in for lunch every day if I like (and I do, very much). It's a Montessori which is also nice. I was a Montessori kid myself (for pre-K and K) so I'm comfortable with their methods, etc. Two of my colleagues also have their kids enrolled in the same facility and they've been very happy with the care their kids receive which is also good to know.

And while I'm not looking forward to going back to work, it's something that needs to be done. We live in a costly part of the country (according to recent reports, we're the 9th most expensive market in the nation) and while A brings home a good amount of bacon, he will be leaving his job at the beginning of next year to take over his family's business. This scares me to no end because when he worked there just out of college years ago, the income wasn't very stable. That was 10+ years ago though and supposedly the company is now so busy, they're turning down work, which hopefully will make for a steady income on par with--or more than--what he currently is making.

As it stands now, A's salary covers all of our living expenses. We've also never been ones to deprive ourselves of nice vacations, dining out regularly, etc. (what can I say? Years of childfree living made us self-indulgent) but without my income going forward, that won't be very possible. So my income is the one that will help see us into retirement, pay for Juliana's college (and whatever else she may have her heart set on--ballet, gymnastics, whatever), allow us to take annual family vacations and weekend mini-vacations, and more. The icing on the income cake if you will.

But yes, I'm conflicted about returning to work. Before I got pregnant I had said I wanted to stay home with our child until he/she started school. When I got pregnant with Juliana, I said I wanted to stay home until she was at least 1. Now that she's here, I wonder how I can leave her at all. But at this point in our lives, leave her I must...at least she'll be right next door though so I can see her every day for my lunch hour. It's not much but I'll take it. Who knows? Maybe that will change once A takes the reins of the family business and I can then stay home with her. For now though, all I can do is hope for the future.

Even on the other side of infertility, hope resides.


At 11:15 AM, Anonymous Day said...

Dee, our lives mirror each other in so many ways. Sal is gearing up to leave the corporate world to take over his family's business soon, and although the income is good, it fluctuates and we'll be relying on me to provide financial stability as a strong backup. And ditto, ditto, and ditto on your feelings about going back to work! It's wonderful that you've found a day care you feel good about - and it's Montessori to boot! Juliana is gorgeous - what a happy face!

At 12:42 PM, Blogger Toffee said...

Hi Dee

I have been thinking about the same thing...work issues. I am going back part time in 4 weeks and then probably fulltime when 4 weeks after that. I will be fortunate to have a nanny full time. My dh left his engineering job 2 years ago to go into the family business (I know...you, Day and I are living parallel lives in different parts of the country!)

I like working and for the effort I put forth I am greatly rewarded, both in money and satisfaction.

There are advantages to being in the family business (at least for my dh..):
1. Flexibilty in hours (most of the time)
2. Perks - travel, PR...lots of events, parties
3. Boss is usually understanding, especially if it involves his/ her grandchild

Still...I wonder about being a SAHM...I actually know very few in my circle...everyone spent too much money & time in school yo give up their career.

Your baby is beautiful...best wishes.

At 4:51 PM, Blogger Pazel said...

I have conflicts with my feelings on work every day. I love my job, and I love my kids. I always knew I would work while I had kids, but it's harder to do once they're here. I want to be involved. I hate being away from them.

My best suggestion for you would be to keep your options open. Maybe you'll go back to work and love it. Or maybe a reduced schedule will give you the best of both worlds. Or maybe you'll want to stay home. You never know how you'll feel until it's here, so leave yourself some room.

And save as much as possible in case his change doesn't work out, or so you can live off of one income if needed or wanted.

There is no one answer for everyone, and you can only know what works for you once you get there.

p.s. Janie is in Montessori and she LOVES it.

At 8:07 PM, Blogger Toni said...

It's hard at first - but you get used to it. I would agree - if you can get a flexible or part-time schedule - it's the best of both worlds.

Good luck. Enjoy :)

At 9:15 PM, Blogger Jen P said...

She is such a beautiful, beautiful little lady.

Whatever you do, you do for the best of your family. And if that means you see your girl at lunch and take her home at night after work, that's what's best for you NOW.

And as time changes, so will you. You're a great mommy and I'm sure it will work for you guys. Ditto Pazel.

You're fantastic and so is that little one!


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