A far cry from normal

Yesterday my Pollyana rose-colored glasses got knocked slightly askew. I had an OB appt, just a regular ole visit but, alas, regular was not in the cards. My BP clocked in at a lovely 147/92 which concerned the good doc (the hot one I'd previously not met) to no end. Luckily, he said, I'm not spilling any protein in my urine so I'm not preeclamptic, at least not yet.

Apparently, as he reminded me, the second trimester really is the 'honeymoon' phase of a pregnancy. If you've been experiencing morning sickness, it usually tapers off, you have more energy, and so on. And your BP also drops--and this, as the doctor said, lulls one into a false sense of security. Silly me. So here I am, staring the start of my third trimester in the face with a sham somewhat secure feeling.

Oh, but wait--there's more from the good doctor. While the 'normal' pregnant patient's odds of developing preeclampsia are around 7%, my odds come in at 25% given my preexisting hypertension and insulin resistance. Great, just great.

So now I've got a slew of labs to have drawn this coming Monday--CBC, complete metabolic panel, RPR, a 24 hour urine (we know what I'll be doing this coming Sunday), as well as fibrinogen (which supposedly can accurately predict if one will become preeclamptic within the coming two weeks from when the test is drawn) and a few others. And I'll now start seeing the OB weekly and--here's the only good part as far as I see it--getting weekly ultrasounds to monitor the baby's growth in case I do develop preeclampsia.

On one hand I'm terrified, and bargaining my body to please please please just do what 'normal' pregnant bodies do and function as it should for the remainder of my pregnancy (now 90-someodd days and counting down). On the other hand, I'm slightly relieved that my girl currently has good survival odds should she need to come out ASAP. But that's not enough to take the worry away completely.

But--as my SIL said, it could have been a bad BP reading. For 1), it was done with a self-inflating BP unit--instead of the old-fashioned hand pump/stethoscope all of the other nurses have used on me previously and 2), it was done on my right arm. I've always heard that the left arm is better at getting more accurate BP readings as its closer to your heart. But--hey--what do I know? And, final point of contention, my BP monitor at home (a combination model--with a manual inflator but electronic reader) has not clocked my BP higher than 120/80 or so at any point in time for the past two weeks. So which is right? No idea. Last night A and I popped by the local Wally World store after dinner so I could take my BP on the machine in their pharmacy area. It came in at 130/80 even, slightly higher than the 110-115/70-80 I'd been getting at home all evening after coming back from the OB.

So, what to believe, I don't know. But I do believe that my fear is growing by the day, and I know that's probably not helping any. I'm going to do what I can to take it easy as much as I can (though I know that there's no way to prevent preeclampsia) and to help my little girl stay in there as long as possible. And keep crossing my fingers for no protein or sugar in my urine, my BP to behave, and my body to be good to me and to her. A hard bargain, I know, given it's past shenanigans...but I've got Hope for it--Hope hasn't left me yet.