/ The RE's Muse: Reflections

The RE's Muse

After 4 years of infertility, 2 surgeries, 1 miscarriage, and 19 months of high risk pregnancies, hubby and I now have two little women in our lives--one a toddler, the other not far behind. Buckle your seatbelts, it's gonna be a wild ride.

Friday, December 21, 2007

Reflections

Lately I've been thinking about my family...or should I say, I've been thinking about the possibility of expanding my family and, well, I'm not too inclined.

At this point in time (10+ months) with Juliana, I suddenly had a bad case of 'baby lust' and thought we should begin trying for #2. Add to that the fact that I wasn't getting any younger (um, I'll be 39 in three months, yikes), and time was of the essence.

Fast forward to today, and D is 10.5 months old, but I definitely don't have that same feeling of baby lust that I had at this point in time with J. Perhaps it's because, with two now, I've realized just how precious my time is when it comes to dividing it between them. Or perhaps it's because I've realized just how hard raising children is and how hard we are on ourselves as moms to make sure that's we're doing it well (notice I didn't say "right" as I don't really think there is such a thing when it comes to raising kids). Or maybe it's because I'm ready for the next/fun part.

I seem to recall something Day might have said about now comes the fun part--something along the lines of now concentrating on raising a family, rather than growing a family.

So, in honor of these deep thoughts I've been having lately, I've begun to give away my baby stuff, giving toys and clothes to others who need them, others still growing their families. I've begun to give away my maternity clothes.

I've begun to let go of the past, the TTC mindset...and have embraced the 'raising part.'

It's lovely here. And I hope each of you still trying soon know this stage firsthand. I think you're gonna like it too.

3 Comments:

At 5:36 PM, Blogger Mutha said...

Amen, sister. It's so much nicer on this side of the struggle.

 
At 5:45 PM, Blogger Chebbles' Mama said...

Holy crap, giving away the baby clothes. That's a big step, and I really admire you for it. Hub-D wants to gun for a third and fourth baby, but sitting here in my seventh month, feeling like Fatty Boombalatty, and not relishing the spectre of additional miscarriages, I'm thinking, "TWO is a marvelous, marvelous number."

 
At 5:42 AM, OpenID meanmama said...

We are pregnant again (due in June), and I am looking forward to knowing I'm DONE! -meanmama (formerly laGiulia)

 

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